There were once two dogs. One dog was good, and did as her masters instructed. She was praised and given many treats. But this dog was sly, although her masters did not know it. Every night, when the kitchen was empty, she would get upon the table and eat of the leftovers. The other dog was a bad dog. He was forever getting into trouble for his misdeeds, which were plenty and outrageous. In his youth he had swallowed many socks, and had been forced to drink hydrogen peroxide, thus inducing much sickness and vomit. He would think nothing of eating a whole loaf of bread, packaging included, and forever the voices could be heard crying in the wilderness "Get Down Billy!"
The good dog, clever and wicked as she was, convinced her masters that the bad dog was responsible for all all the mischevious (nay, odorous) doings within the household. The bad dog, being stupid and boneheaded, accepted blame and punishment as his due.
One day, however, the master came into the room and found the good dog with a bone in her mouth.
"was this not meant for the dogs at Christmas?" the master asked.
"Verily, yes" the mistress replied.
Upstairs, the mistress found much evidence of naughtiness, with ripped packaging and shredded cellophane all that remained of 4 chocolate Christmas gifts she had bought for her children. The good dog hung her head in shame, for her sins had been found out. The bad dog, being boneheaded and stupid, missed out on all the action and the free chocolate.
- I have been married to Andy since 1991, we have 4 daughters, 2 dogs, 2 cat, 4 rabbits (and various baby rabbits) and a hamster (not dead). We have lived in the U.S.A since 2000, and are citizens of the U.K. I miss many things about the U.K.(pubs, old buildings, red post boxes, church bells,narrow roads, a good joint of roast lamb with mint sauce, to name but a few) but I have grown to love the U.S.